Onwards and Upwards – again!

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I have had a tricky couple of weeks that came to a head over the weekend. I was in so much pain and so upset. Friday was very bad but Saturday a bit better and we went out to Cheltenham. There were some things we needed and I was going stir crazy in the house as I hadn’t been able to leave it since the previous Saturday. The weather looked promising. However, it started raining hard as soon as we got there. We returned cold and wet and also very sore from the drive and being bumped around in a wheelchair in the rain. Pavements and slopes on and off were designed for wheelchairs by someone who has never been in one.

By Saturday night and Sunday I was screaming with pain every time I moved and crying. My husband decided Monday he was taking time off to take me to the GP. I had no idea what they could do for me, but as he had taken the time off I did fee I had to go. She gave me Tramadol. I’ve never taken it before and was rather alarmed by the list of side effects but what a difference after just 2 doses! The pain was still there, but considerably lessened and no longer in my back and down my leg – centred quite definitely in my left hip joint instead. I looked forward to the Tramadol psychedelic dreams reported by others in  the forum too, but the only side effect I got was sleep! Wonderful!!

The GP also took blood from me because I was SO tired and had a slightly raised temperature, but I’m pleased to find there is no infection and I assume no anaemia. Certainly since the pain as lifted I feel far better – not so tired or generally unwell as I had been, although I was knitting yesterday and simply couldn’t keep my eyes open. The Tramadol does seem to make me much more relaxed and sleepy rather than just dog tired – or that could be a result of having less pain.

I had gone back to 2 crutches to take some of the strain. I clearly had been trying to do too much as, in doing so, my husband had fallen into thinking all was ok with me, but today I have gone back to 1 crutch so I can carry things and practicing a little walking slowly and carefully with nothing to build those muscles and try to make sure I walk straight.

So – onwards and upwards! Things are much much better again and I’m looking forward to the continuous improvement.

Just a side note – the hippy blanket is coming on. I have a mixture of squares done – 50 (ish – depending on the pattern) stitches x 60 rows makes them all roughly the same size to (hopefully) be sewn together into a blanket. I have stockinette, garter, 3 x 3 rib, ridged bands, moss stitch, double moss stitch, basket weave, wave and zigzag in a colour mix, jade, red and purple. I have 4 hearts made from another pattern which now take me about an hour each, and the idea with these is to appliqué them to plain squares of a different colour, just for a different interesting bit. Still a long way to go, and many of the squares and hearts have mistakes. However, I am being reminded constantly that you learn such a lot from correcting mistakes, that sometimes things are ‘good enough’ and that the mistakes are also part of the journey and letting go of aiming for perfection is realistic and ok. A parallel to my ‘hippy’ journey 🙂 

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